I'm sorry that you weren't more pleased with your experience. As you point out, most of my reviews are "incredibly positive!" (94% out of 37 reviews are 4 and 5 star. There are two 3 star reviews, one of them is yours. There are no 1 or 2 star reviews). I will be sure to look into your issues. That said, this is my home, and I very much enjoy sharing it with guests from all over! It is a quirky, comfortable, well equipped, and very reasonably priced home. As you yourself put it, you are nitpicking, I agree. In the interest of clarity, I will address a few of the issues you raised. ****The "no actual bed" is indeed a mattress on a box spring on the carpeted floor. That's how I like it! It is also a $3,000 high end, 100% organic everything, eco-friendly everything, mattress imported from California. Most guests also find it to be extremely comfortable! *** Yes there are nail clippers in the medicine chest. I live there, and I clip my nails. The broken razor you mention is from a lovely shaving store in New Orleans. I enjoy looking at it when I open the medicine chest. I'm sorry that this somehow impinged on your visit. Most of the other items are first aid related. *** The locked cabinets you mentioned are locked with two of the tiniest padlocks imaginable - any smaller and I would not be able to manage them. *** Sorry about the spider and the fly. It is a country home, and despite my best efforts, there may be an occasional spider. *** I do apologize about the 2 broken strings on the guitar. A recent guest somehow broke them, so at the moment, yes, it is only of decorative use. I will get a new set of strings on there shortly. *** I'm glad that you enjoyed the comfortable recliners! The offending foot rest is indeed a little delicate, but with the simple use it was intended for, works quite well and is also very comfortable. That chair and that footstool belonged to my late father. It's covering is a beautiful black leather, well used, but a delight to take a nap in. *** Yes, indeed, the "omission" of a TV is a little unusual. As you point out, I make that very clear in my description. Perhaps if you had taken more advantage of your time away from a television, and read one of the many, many books provided, an insanely eclectic and interesting collection, rather than reading expiration dates on items that occupy about 2% of the refrigerator...who knows, you might have enjoyed your visit more thoroughly!